fantasy love

Sorry. I don’t know why there are stupid spaces between every line.  I tried to remove them, but it was being angry with me so I gave up. This is my newest poem. I can’t believe writers block finally decided to disappear this afternoon.

He’s the only person

who can make me

blush

in all the wrong places

cherry rush

riding up my neck

kissing my ears

and that’s just

the conversation

sweet talking

his way into my

memories.

I’m all for artificial

love

in it’s overly-curved

form

heart buried deeply

between mountains

of insecurities

maybe

the right type

of healing

is done

when draping

my bones

in a beautiful pattern

across your heartbeat

or when my toes

tickle yours

at sunrise

because I had nowhere

else to go

last night.

or any night

before that one.

I’m good at

being

just maybe not existing

as anything but

his

sexylittlethang

twisted tightly

around his pinky,

promises made at midnight.

my tongue mumbles each

morning,

a paperweight,

rolling around my cheeks

like rocks

in a babbling brook.

I pray,

fingertips clenched

around grandma’s

favorite whiskey

bible

that one day

he’ll peer into the

green glass forests

floating in my eyes

and like a car wreck

he’ll see

they only read

“vacant.”

I want to scream

“take a look

at what you’ve done,

you’ve left me

a cliff

hanger

at the end

of your broken heart

the last sweet note

of ecstasy

you might ever

get to taste.”

but instead

we chain smoke

fistfuls of cigarettes,

crumbling them

beneath our nails

when they burn out

–kind of like our lives did

…at age nineteen.

I know I’ve rid myself

of every chance I had

at true love,

because I’ve heard

it hurts

(the velveteen rabbit

was proof enough

of that bullshit)

and I don’t need to suffer

any more

than my shattered

childhood,

full of broken promises

arranged

in a four letter word

–r     a       p       e.

If I’m being honest,

maybe,

I never deserved happy.

after all,

some dreams

might be better left

never coming

true.

(c) copyright by Rose Kendall

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2 thoughts on “fantasy love

  1. Fantastic Rose! Thanks for sharing!! Beautify written and it all flowed so well.
    My heart is awakened as I’m safe.of it beating loud after reading poem.
    God Bless!

    1. Thank you friend. I was so glad I was able to write again after that writer’s block. Too many thoughts were swarming about, and that helped get rid of some of them for a while 🙂

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